Have you seen the Newsweek cover? The one that says that Obama's critics are "dumb"? It's outrageous, isn't it? That they not only printed an article by Andrew Sullivan, they also put the man's article on the cover!

 

(As for the cover article itself… I don't know, whatever. I haven't read it. I mean, I tried, but it was too long. I lost interest halfway through. Lamestream Media. Too busy. I'm just a working mom here in the heartland! I don't have time to read multi-page Newsweek articles that are relevant to my interests. Give me a break!)

 

Andrew Sullivan is on my List. You know: the List that I keep of everyone who has ever wronged me. Or even dared to challenge me. Or even questioned my order briefly just for clarification. ON. THE. LIST. You remember "TrooperGate" right? That dude went on my List. It's been four years, but my rat bastard ex-brother-in-law is still on there. Oh, he's there.

 

It's not that I think I'm better than everyone else. It's that I AM better than everyone else. More powerful, more important, more deserving of respect. And that is why I decided to publicly shame Newsweek for continuing to promote the reporter who had the temerity to question whether or not Trig is my baby.

 

I don't care if it's his job, as a reporter, to report things! What I care about is that Sullivan dared to cross me. Okay, indirectly. Okay, everyone had pretty much forgotten about it until I brought it up last week. BUT STILL.

 

It's pretty clear that Sullivan has an axe to grind about me. He's in good company! Which is to say: he is on the List. And as such, I have made it my sworn job to attack him at every corner. Fight fair? What's the point in that? I'll tell you where "fighting fair" gets you: nowhere, that's where. I say, if you're in a fight, then fight! Kick 'em in the nuts! Sucker punch! Reload! 

 

Obviously I'm not going to address the issue that, as a critic of Obama, Newsweek just called me "dumb." But rest assured, Newsweek is on my List, too. Although it's in tinier handwriting, and I'm prepared to pretend they were never on there, if they ever sniff around looking to give me a cover article again.

 

The important take-away message here is that Andrew Sullivan is a kook, while I am a fine upstanding (if sometimes misunderstood) American. Who is in favor of gassing baby wolves in their dens.