Had a great interview with Hannity the other night, about how the attacks on Newt Gingrich are actually opportunities. It's an "attackitunity"! Turn that frown upside down! Your hate only feeds me! I'm rubber and you're glue! Etc.

 

In hindsight, I would never in a million years admit that I misused the words "incentivized" and "covertly." I do not misuse words. Ever. I may use them in a context with which you are unfamiliar, like I might use the word "covertly" when someone else might use the word "accidentally" or "unintentionally." But that doesn't mean I used the word "covertly" wrong. It just means that English is an evolving language, and maybe you don't understand the word "covertly" as well as you thought you did. (Note to self: ask fans to update Wikipedia pages for "covertly" and "incentivize.")

 

The same goes for the word "incentivize" which maybe someone else would have used a word like "inspire" or "encourage." But whatever. It's a smart word, isn't it? I used it, therefore, I am smart. Kinda the same thing as my smart girl glasses. It's all about appearances, out here in the working mom heartland with the good people of America. AMERICA.

 

"Way to go to covertly hype this, even Gingrich opponents for being so brilliant they sure are dumb." That's right, I said it. Maybe it doesn't technically make sense, but it sounds good! It incentivizes my fans to covertly go out there and vote for Newt Gingrich, then I don't care. 

 

Okay now about this whole Newt Gingrich thing, I admit that I had a tough time keeping a straight face when I told Hannity that the liberals should be ashamed of themselves for holding such an old grudge, grinding the axe, being bitter about ex-spouses and all. Because you all know, that is my style exactly: always hold a grudge. I am the Grudge Queen, I can do anything! And the liberals with their open marriage, why are they bringing such old news to the table?

 

Look. You and I both know: men are pigs. Lying, cheating, philandering pigs. There's nothing "covert" about it. In my years as a pretty female politician, I have learned to look the other way, just like you do when the dog starts licking its privates in the living room. You pretend not to notice, and you do whatever it takes to climb your way to the top. And if that means defending Newt Gingrich for being a lying, cheating, philandering pig, then so be it.